July 20, 2013

Blog Post: The Black Tongue of Death...

So, this morning the craziest thing happened. I woke up, pried myself out of bed at an ungodly hour and then went to the bathroom so I could start my morning routine. I got out my toothpaste slathered it on my toothbrush and then did the next logical thing. I opened my mouth to brush my teeth and what I saw almost sent me into some kind of cardiac arrest.

My tongue was black. BLACK...How does that even happen? I legit thought I was dying. I think I might have hyperventilated a little and starting writing my will in my head wondering if I would have enough time to get it on paper before I keeled over. (Yea, so okay I'm a little dramatic, but hello did I mention my tongue was BLACK?!?)

Then I thought hey why don't I just scrape it off? So I took my toothbrush and brushed my tongue, okay fine, more like scrubbed the ever loving shit out of it and low and behold the black came off. It left a crazy disgusting mess in the sink and, but it was off my tongue. Now after inspecting my tongue in the mirror for close to twenty minutes (yes, I poked it) I had calmed down enough to rationalize that I probably wasn't dying.

So, I turned on my computer and Googled that shit because Google holds the answers to all of life's questions. And I found out the cause; Pepto Bismol! The chemicals inside of it react with the sulfur that the saliva gives off and BOOM black tongue.

I had an upset stomach last night, so I took one not long before falling asleep, dear god I will never take one again! Waking up with a black tongue took about twenty years off my life. In conclusion if you ever wake up with a black tongue it's probably from the Pepto so don't freak out like I did...Death is not knocking just yet.


  1. Hahaha, that has totally happened to me before! And I completely understand because it was SCARY.AS.HELL. :)

    1. OMG so scary! I was like AHHHH I'm dying! :O haha
      They really should put that on the label! LoL

  2. Wow, sounds scary. Glad it was just Pepto Bismol.

    1. It totally was! They really should put that on the label so people don't have mini heart attacks when they wake up with black tongues! :)


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